One of the not-so good attribute of us Filipinos is being "uto-uto." Yes! Uto-uto - the attitude of saying yes over and over again eventhough it meant losing our own decision-making abilities and being laughed at by some "witty" individuals who pretends to be the stronger few. Being uto-uto means doing an act without deeply thinking about it. Because we are hardcore to our values, we don't realize we are also violating our selves for saying yes eventhough the real answer is no. It is not really wrong to say yes especially if your reason for doing so is to become reliant individuals.
We easily take the bait of saying "yes," and we unknowingly patronize abusers. So it becomes a habit. Saying yes all over and over again.
It is innate with our culture to please everyone -- especially those who are harder to please. It is for the same reason we have tolerated being colonized by different cultures. And for the same reason that we are still under the hegemony of colonialism.
And because of this we easily get fooled.
We become fascinated over something new to our eyes, something unique with our tastes or something fascinating with our senses. Just like when we try an un-reliable product and swore you shouldn't have bought it. Or when for example buying some pretty food on a restaurant which isn't so adorable when being swallowed.
What is so nerve-racking is that despite being fooled, some still smile and charge it to experience. Some still trusts and open up with the hopes of not experiencing the same fate again. The cycle of trusting-being fooled one more time goes on and on. While it is a sad story to hear, some people don't learn their lesson very well.
When it is time to stop, the red light should be flashing ON. When you reach the limit, the only word left to say is NO. Nothing's really over until you reject it. You should always tie the rope of the borderline.
There isn't anything wrong with pleasing someone. Just make sure to be pleased in return.
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